Cottleston Pie

I've never been on a diet per se, but I've always had one and I've grown to become aware of it. On various television shows, they'll have a zookeeper as a guest. The keeper will often stress how carefully they regulate their charges' diets to keep the animals healthy and happy. The way I see it, I am my own zookeeper.

I've re-arranged my diet a bit a number of months ago based on a bit of news. The news wasn't new, but Scientific American magazine put it all together in a way that made sense:

Scientific American: Rebuilding the Food Pyramid [ Nutrition ]
The dietary guide introduced a decade ago has led people astray. Some fats are healthy for the heart, and many carbohydrates clearly are not.

As a result, the primary change that I've made thus far has been to increase the liquid vegetable oils and nuts and peanuts (which aren't nuts of course, but they are pretty good imitation for a legume) and decrease the carbohydrates to balance out the total calories. I've been choosing an Italian or vinegar and oil dressing on a sandwich rather than cheese. I've switched snacks from crackers, bread, or cereal to mixed nuts. I'm less squeamish about the quantity of liquid oils in South Indian cooking (ghee is still probably not a good idea).

A few weeks ago, I bought a jar of peanut butter. Possibly the first jar that I've ever bought for myself. Not one of those Jif-like brands that are almost as much sugar as peanuts, with trans-fat oils added to stabilize and prevent oil separation. If I want candy, I'll go for a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup. No, I found a jar with just two ingredients: peanuts and salt. The oil was completely separated and on top of the product. It took me forty five minutes of churning with a butter knife to put it all back together again. But that is what television was invented for.

It's divine. I made a discovery about peanut butter that I like to call the dog-smack effect. The taste is good. The aftertaste is fantastic. It's no wonder that when you feed a dog some peanut butter, he'll make smacking noises for a long time as he slowly enjoys the peanut butter that gets caught on the roof of his mouth. Now I do it too! :-)

"Is one of us supposed to be a dog in this scenario?"
Yeah, I am. I'm the dog.